Checking in for a new adventure… one like we’ve never experienced before… In August, Mr S and I expect the arrival of our baby boy and the start of a brand new chapter of our lives.
Long time readers may be wondering what took us so long, after all we’d been married nearly five years and together over eight! Well, I really wanted to feel like the time was right, that I was finished with the crazy travelling and done ‘doing me’, ready to devote all my attention to a little person. You might remember reading my post on my travel plans and wanderlust wish list for 2019 where I noted craving a slower style of travel and enjoying relaxation time rather than a packed itinerary. When I wrote that post I didn’t actually know that our little bean was already growing inside me but I think a intuitive part of me knew, and I was ready for a more settled life.
All that being said, baby boy Silver did come as something of a (most welcome) surprise but as soon as we found out, everything just fell into place and felt completely right. Personally, I love reading stories of how people discovered that they were pregnant so I thought I’d use this post to tell you the story as well as few thoughts about where this blog may go over the next few months during my pregnancy and beyond once we welcome the new arrival.
As for the story… everything surrounding pregnancy can be a little TMI which isn’t really my style so I’m attempting to tell you in a way that doesn’t make me feel too awkward! Anyway, starting a family had been on our minds for the last few years but I’d never really felt quite ready… my blog was going well and I’d established my own small business that I ran single-handedly, I enjoyed my own personal travel as well as press trip invites that really felt too tempting to give up but it was beginning to awaken in my mind that yes… maybe I was ready.
It was around mid-December when I went for a Christmas dinner with a group of blogger friends, we had a fab time at the dinner but next day I woke up feeling totally wiped out. This was more than just a hangover, I was so tired that I could barely move from my bed, and I felt nauseous but was never actually sick (told you it’s all TMI, I’m not one to talk about vomiting on my luxury travel blog!) plus the thought of food made me feel even worse.
I put it down to food poisoning and as the week wore on I started to feel a bit better and able to leave my flat. Though every time I went out, I simply couldn’t wait to be back in my bed watching Netflix (I got through a fair few series!), it was totally unlike me and especially during the Christmas period when I very much enjoy seeing people and going out.
Christmas itself came and I was so turned off by the rich Christmas foods (tomato soup became my staple diet!) and alcoholic beverages held no appeal, they just made me feel more nauseous. I didn’t feel exactly ill but I felt tired and basically just not myself… Ladies who’ve experienced pregnancy will probably be screaming at the screen… er obviously you were pregnant how did you not know? Well for various reasons I thought it would take me a while to get pregnant and none of my symptoms were really strong… I always thought pregnancy was like the movies where you see women running to the toilet to be sick every minute. Terrible sickness had also been the case for most of my friends, so having never even been physically sick and with no other symptoms except (by now) mild tiredness I just thought it was a winter bug and a touch of SAD.
Come January, I’d been feeling funny for a few weeks…Mr S was probably getting fed up of daily text messages saying, ‘I don’t feel like myself but I don’t know why…’ and I’d developed a new symptom. A pain in my side that wasn’t going away. It was high time for a visit to the GP to nip this in the bud and find out what was wrong.
‘So you’re in your thirties, you have tiredness and nausea… and you’ve missed a period…’ Ok I know what it sounds like I replied to the GP… she sent me off to do a test and confirmed then and there in her office that I was indeed pregnant. Of course, surprise doesn’t even come close to describing it and at that point I can’t say I was elated as my mind quickly went over the things I’d done over the past month… drinking over Christmas (albeit much less than I would have), that creamy brie on the cheese board, big sushi feasts, not taking any prenatal vitamins. I left her office in disbelief (I even did a quick Waitrose shop!), how was this possible? I didn’t feel pregnant, I looked the same and my symptoms were no worse than a very mild hangover.
I came home and called Mr S. ‘You need to come home straight away’ knowing I’d been feeling ill and I’d had a doctor’s appointment that day, Mr S was home within fifteen minutes. The news was out of my mouth straight away, and like me his first reaction was fear rather than joy as he thought back to the ski trip we’d taken, a big night out for New Year’s, copious caffeine consumed and HIIT workouts. He headed to Boots and two Clearblue tests confirmed what the doctor told me (obviously) and my blood test results landed in the my email the next day only giving further confirmation. Ok, I’m definitely pregnant but hopefully other women will concur that simply being told you are (even if it is by a doctor plus numerous conclusive tests) still leaves you in a little disbelief as you look at your normal-looking stomach. Sensing my worry, the GP had suggested that I go for an early scan for some reassurance.
We managed to get an appointment for a private scan two days later at the Portland Hospital. I have to say I’d never felt so afraid as I waited out these days, just hoping that everything would be ok with the baby. Finally the morning came and Mr S and I met with the sonographer, when the ultrasound was applied we immediately heard the beautiful sound of that thumping heart beat and saw our little one bobbing around happily all in the right place. Next came another shocking piece of news…
‘By the size of the baby, I would date you at 11 weeks’… what! We’d been expecting eight weeks… At that point I couldn’t help the tears fall from my eyes as I thought about all the things I’d done wrong. The sonographer reassured me that this happens to so many people and everything she saw was a perfectly healthy baby, but even so my worries made it hard for me to enjoy ‘meeting’ my baby for the first time. But after we left that photo of the scan became my prized possession, I kept looking to see that little foot again!
Though fears still filled our hearts we started telling our close family plus one or two very close friends. Though we were actually already close to that 12 week mark that’s considered the safety point we still weren’t ready to tell more until after the second scan. The more people we told, the more we felt reassured… everyone has a few drinks before finding out their pregnant, a bit of sushi won’t harm your baby… oh folic acid.. I totally forgot to take that anyway… The strongest reassurance came from Mr S’s dad who has been practicing doctor for well over fifty years. I want to elaborate on thoughts and feelings as well as the processes that we went through in the first trimester but I think I’ll save that for another post.
Needless to say that as we felt reassured and with two healthy scans under our belt we started to feel better and soon the euphoria of expanding our family took hold. I’m now writing this post from the relatively safe vantage point of 23 weeks with a confirmed place of birth, several more healthy scans (including the all important twenty week scan) and passing my blood test results with flying colours.
As for the blog, I always thought I’d try and stick to my old style if we ever have a baby but I’ve found myself feeling so excited about incorporating personal baby related posts as well as pregnancy travel tips and eventually family travel. So while you can expect lots of changes, I also don’t want to alienate readers who enjoy my current content so I hope to keep a mixture of both. One thing I’ve always thought about having a baby is don’t plan ahead too much as you never know how you will feel so that being said I can only tell you my hopes and nothing definite. One thing I will say, is that this space on the internet is certainly here to stay, as well as my Instagram account which is updated daily.
One more thing I wanted to mention – referring back to that wanderlust wish list post that I published in January before I knew I was pregnant. I spoke about a dream trip with a favourite hotel brand. Well lots of you DM’d me about this to see how the planning was going and many of you guessed the location but not the hotel brand. I’d been invited to Peru with Relais and Chateaux to stay in two of their hotels and go on an Amazon cruise! Can you believe I actually had all this confirmed and had booked my flights on airmiles! I had planned to ‘fill in the blanks’ and pay for other elements of the trip myself. I had actually already booked and paid for the iconic Hiram Bingham Belmond train to Machu Picchu.
Anyway, something in the back of my mind told me to be very mindful when making these bookings and I was very weary about checking cancellation policies. With this trip planned for mid-July and baby Silver due in August, there was no question I’d need to cancel. The long journey and proximity to the due date aside this wouldn’t have been a great trip to make when pregnant due to altitude sickness and the mosquitoes carrying various diseases in the Amazon jungle as well as other factors.
And was I upset about cancelling a trip to Peru for the second time (especially with such a prestigious partnership)? I can hand on my heart say not at all, there was a sense of relief like my body was telling me it was the wrong time to go. We also had to cancel our trip to New York and Bermuda for a wedding too as this was quite late in the pregnancy and I thought the flight was too much in my third trimester.
We’re planning an appropriate babymoon instead which I’ll have news of soon plus a post detailing tips for planning your own babymoon.
Mr S and I couldn’t be more excited to start the biggest adventure of our lives, and baby Silver…We can’t wait to meet you!!!